How about tossing me a couple of GOOD days, huh? Now, I know you're busy. You've got all sorts of planets to align, and sun's to explode, and shit like that. But can't you take a few seconds to throw me a bone, dude? Rick Springfield gets a come back tour & a New York Times best seller, and I get a week full of infinite depression, missed moments with family, and a terrible urge to drink myself stupid. You see something wrong with that, Mr. or Mrs. Universe? What? Oh, Rick Springfield's book is about depression? Cool. Good for Jessie's Girl. What, you don't give out more than one good day for depressed people? What kind if crap is that? I saw Springfield on Dr. Oz today, and he looked pretty primed to go. No depression there. Oh, he seemed pretty much over it, and willing to advocate, BUT wouldn't admit to having an actual diagnosis? What a phony! Making money off of things he's too afraid... YES, I was watching Dr. Oz! Is that somehow offensive to you? My point is, Rick has had enough. I would like to borrow a few good days so I can turn some stuff in my life around. That's all. Geeze! Don't give ME guff about watching a show YOU let happen! You know what, Universe? You give me some good days (and I mean GOOD days), or I'll tell Buddha what you said about Krishna, and when that gets back to Zeus, Jesus will kick your ass! That's right! Jesus.... and his cousins, Eduardo, Cheech, and Machete. What about that Universe fancy pants?
Jokes aside, I'd really appreciate a break.
-joel
